I really enjoyed reading this book. I think, in part, I enjoyed it so much because I very much come from this “perspective” on how to deal with kids. Having worked in an alternative school my first two years of teaching, I found ways to engage students in their learning despite their background or circumstances. While I very much come from a perspective of having students find their own solutions and their own consequences, this book was helpful in aiding me to build more structures for dialogue.
Main Ideas:
· Offer choices. Choices you are okay with.
· Rather than creating a list of rules, establish with the class – baseline values from which you run your class. For years I have done with my class and I present it to them on the first day and explain how I feel a successful will look and sound like:
Our classroom will be
a COMMUNITY of learners,
a RESPECTFUL HOME where we use APPROPRIATE LANGUAGE
in a non-offensive manner,
a place of SUPPORT and EXCHANGE of knowledge,
a community who comes PREPARED TO LEARN,
a community who accepts RESPONSIBILITY for his or her actions,
a community of SELF-ADVOCATES.
· Engage in a healthy problem-solving dialogue, not a power struggle or counseling session. You are not to solve all of their problems nor their consequences.
· Develop techniques/interventions: The “evil eye”, moving in on the student, proximity, eye contact w/ a “no” headshake, “let’s talk about this later”, “Can you save that? Thanks!, changing locations, “I” messages, enforceable statements, providing choices, giving an appointment, informational letters and a few more.
One of the last chapters talked about a conference the author was at and the woman who was presenting had a very “canned’ speech. Someone in the audience told her to tell them just ONE thing they could take away from her presentation. She said….make your students fall in love with you. Because when they don’t love themselves, they won’t do anything for themselves.
You need not be their best friend but having them enjoy you as a person and enjoy learning about what you teach. I think back to my most favorite teachers, the teachers that I wish I was still in school so I could learn more from, I adored them. I adored them for who I thought they were and everything they knew or did for the community. I adored professors who could tell a great story in a way that was not only entertaining but completely relevant to the course content. I distinctly remember Professor Caron on my freshman year of college introducing a required class in my major “Intimate Relationships”. I didn’t know what to expect but what I learned is that he really put his heart and soul into teaching. We all learned a little bit about his past from the examples he used from his personal life. He taught other classes and I took every single one of them. And, likewise, in every single class I thought I would change my area of focus he was just that good at teaching. I wanted to be a marriage therapist, then a gerontologist and then ….really whatever he taught.
I think if you can sell students on who you are as a person and explain your perspective or thinking process to them, it’s a whole other ball game. Everyday each of us (staff and students) are dealing with life’s issues but we come together to work and learn. I can’t expect all of my students to be on their top game everyday but what I can do is facilitate a conversation to get them to be on top of their game. This interest in their lives from a teacher, builds rapport and respect.
One last thing I found very interesting in the textbook. If a student decides they want to argue with you about any topic, you could say, “That sounds like an argument. I schedule arguments at 7:15 am and 3:15 pm daily. Feel free to come back at that time.” Never before have I thought to use that phrasing in my classroom. I have, however, said “I can understand you are upset. Let’s both take a break and talk about it when we are more calm.”
Overall, it was a great book to read. While it resonated with my views on classroom management and student intervention, I learned a lot of new tips that I will carry with me in my classroom.